MyTransitionPartner v 2.0beta

quick answers about all things transgender

Find quick answers to questions about transgender identity. For more detailed answers, follow the links provided with each question.

• General
• Social/Legal
• Appearance
  
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What does transgender mean?
Transgender is a gender identity and is a term which covers a variety of identities and expressions which are different that the one assigned at birth. When a person is transgender they may identify with the gender opposite the one they were assigned at birth or they may not identify with any gender (gender queer) or they may identify with multiple genders (qender fluid). Learn more about gender identity.

What’s the correct terminology?
Terminology can be tricky when you aren’t familiar with a certain issue or culture. If you don’t know the appropriate term to use, then it is okay to ask. In general, however, the terms “transgendered, tranny, and shemale” are offensive terms and should be avoided completely. Many people are confused about why “transgendered” is offensive. This term is offensive because it implies that being transgender is something that happened rather than something that is a natural part of a transgender person’s life. Additionally, you shouldn’t call a transgender person “a transgender.” Instead you can say they “are transgender” or “trans”  or you can say “trans person” or “trans people” or “trans folk.” Trans sexual refers to a person who is undergoing or has completed a medical transition. This term can be touchy for many trans people, therefore it is safe to avoid using it and using trans instead. Learn more about terminology.

What does cisgender mean?
Cisgender is a gender identity and is a term which covers individuals who identify with the gender that was assigned to them at birth. Learn more about gender identity.

Are transgender people “crazy?”

Being transgender is not a mental disorder as being transgender does not automatically entail significant emotional distress and psychological disability. Many transgender people live successful and fulfilling lives in a variety of scientific and artistic disciplines. Because of the intense stress trans people experience in their individual processes of coming out and becoming a better version of themselves (stresses such as rejection from family and friends, the cost of health care, social alienation, etc.) many trans people suffer from higher rates of depression, anxiety, and suicide than the rest of the population. Most major medical and psychological organizations such as the American Psychological Association, the American Medical Association, and the American Academy of Pediatrics denounce views or therapies which would attempt to “fix” transgender people or make them feel abnormal and embrace evidence-based practices which seek to improve the quality of life for transgender patients.

Aren’t transgender people just gay?

Gender expression and identity is different than sexual orientation. Transgender people can be gay, straight, bisexual, asexual, pansexual, and more! Moreover, a person’s sexual orientation can change throughout their lifetime, and their attractions can change during their transition. Learn more about sexual orientation.

My parents are having a hard time accepting me. What should I do?
Coming out to your loved ones is the hardest part of the process because these folks matter more to us than anyone else. Indeed, many times it has been these people who have forced us to remain in the closet and have caused most of our trauma. Learn more about coming out.

How do I handle misgendering?

Remain calm. If you get nervous, then you will not communicate what you want to say effectively. Take a deep breath and calmly say: “actually, my pronouns are […].” If you know the person and they are aware of your transition, do not take it personally. It may be difficult for many people to make name/pronoun adjustments. Unless you expect misgendering/misnaming is intentional, you should approach these mistakes with compassion and understanding. Doing so will help assist your transition in the workplace. Transgender Law Center has excellent guides to aid your coworkers in making the transition with you, as well as employer resources.  HRC has excellent guides to aid your school in support transgender students and a Guide on the Federal Government’s Title IX Guidance.  If you are having trouble with you parents, remember this: Transitioning is a process which includes the transgender individual and their loved ones. It is important to approach your loved ones with compassion and understand that while you’ve had a lifetime to consider your feelings, they only get a couple seconds to take in what you are telling them before they respond. There may be angry and hurtful words, but don’t take them personally. Family counseling is often essential to heal any wounds which appear as the result of coming out. Marriage and Family Therapists (also known as Couple and Family Therapists) are usually affirming and are an excellent resource. Additionally, you can share our Loved One Resources with your family and friends who need answers and help in their transition with you.

Where can I find information about my legal rights and changing my name and gender marker?

We’ve compiled links to the best online resources to aid you in your legal transition. Learn about name changes here. Learn about gender marker changes here.

What options do I have for permanent hair removal?

Electrolysis, laser hair removal, and waxing are options you can use for permanent hair removal. Learn more about permanent hair removal here.

How do I figure out clothing?

Clothing is tricky. Your best bet is to ask a friend of the same gender for help in deciding what fits you and what doesn’t. A large part of sizing is trial and error. Learn more about clothing here.

What can I do for breasts?

If you can't afford surgery you can purchase breast forms for under $300. Learn more about breast forms here. If you have breasts you want to disguise, then chest binding is your best option if you can't afford surgery. Learn more about binding here.

What can I do about my genitalia pre-op?
If you want to disguise your genitalia, then a gaff, purchased or home-made, will help to flatten your crotch area. Learn more about gaffs here. If you want to enhance your crotch area, a packet will provide the aesthetic of a penis. Learn more about packers here.

How can I find a trans-friendly therapist or doctor?
We’ve compiled tips for finding trans-affirming providers here.

Do I really have to live as my preferred gender for a year before I can start hormones?

WPATH Standards of Care do not require you live as your preferred gender for a year; however, many old-school physicians may require this. If your provider asks this of you, then you should find another provider.
Do I need a note from my psychologist to start hormones?
Some doctors will require a note from your psychologist before they will see you. Because transitioning is such an emotionally draining experience, it is often advisable for you to be prepared emotionally and psychologically for the changes you are about to undergo. Moreover, it is a good idea to have the support of a therapeutic relationship in order to navigate the mood swings associated with hormone therapy.
When can I have surgeries to help me become a better version of myself?
There a a number of gender affirming surgeries (also known as sexual reassignment surgery or gender reassignment surgery) which can be performed in order to help transgender folk feel more themselves. Not all transgender people choose to have these surgeries, and it is up to each transgender person to to decide if surgery is best for them. Learn more here.

Will my insurance cover my transition-related health care?
It depends on your insurance, as well as, the ways in which Federal and State law change over the next decade. Contact your insurance provider to find out if your transition-related health care is covered.

What options do I have for hormone replacement (HRT)?

MTF transgender people take a cocktail of androgen blockers (to reduce testosterone) and estrogen. Additionally, progesterone may be prescribed to assist in breast development. FTM transgender people take testosterone. See more here.

How will hormones change my body?
Everyone is different, and there is no standard timeline for what will change and when. In general, you can expect to see changes to your secondary sex characteristics, heightened feminization and masculinization, depending on what hormones you are taking. See more here.

What surgeries can I have to become a better version of myself?

There are many different gender affirming surgery options. You don't have to have all or any of them as part of your transition. Learn more here.

What about voice therapy?

A licensed voice therapist can work with trans women to feminize their voice. Learn more here.